Am I Missing Something?

I put my son down for a nap this morning and instead of doing something constructive, I opened up my  reader and started getting lost. It's a bad habit. I'm sure you can relate.

At some point during my aimless wanderings, I invariably end up reading about "copy" writing. I don't even know what this is, but it always intrigues me, because I think  "Holy shit! Writing to make money? That's what I want to do!"

I'm always disappointed, because it's always about advertising. Maybe if I hadn't smoked most of twenties away, I would remember that when I get on the 'puter and start surfing around. Maybe I should just google the damn word and stop being such a dumbass about the whole thing. I mean shit - I am at least intelligent enough to realize that, if there was an easy way to make money writing on the interweb, everyone would be doing it.

I'm getting a little off topic, though.

I keep coming across this "hard sell" shit and it's a little tough to swallow, but today was the worst. I read that blogging is "mainly a for - profit enterprise" - "otherwise, why do it at all?" and that it is also a popularity contest. I need a brand? I'm selling something? To a "target"?

WTF??

What the f*ck am I selling? Myself? My child?

And if I'm not, am I just wasting time?

I started this blog as a space for myself, to explore a new avenue of writing, to keep people who know me in the loop, and hopefully, to find a little bit of community out there who may be able to give me some pointers, or at least enocuragement, in this whole new "mom" thing. I mean, I don't have a whole ton of friends with kids, and my mom isn't around to give me advice anymore, so I figured "what the hell?"

Now I do it because I enjoy it. I like seeing my words on screen. I like having a little impetus to write. I like constantly challenging myself to write better. I like seeing what's out there, and I love getting feedback. I love that people out there are reading this blog because they enjoy it.

But those nagging questions remain:

Am I wasting my time?

Am I missing something?